A manifesto for the year.
By Adam Reynolds on Jan 13, 2016
In these early days of 2016, you’ve probably returned to work all bright eyed and keen to make an impression. This is going to be your year. So if you’re looking for shortcuts to success, I’m very happy to help.
First, you’re going to need a memorable name. A name industry hacks will gleefully herald when you clean up at an awards do. A name that leaps out from the dozens of CVs sitting on a Creative Director’s desk. A name recruitment agents will clamour to tout around town to the highest bidder. That nice, sensible name your parents gave you? Forget it. Who the hell ever remembered a guy called Edward Williams? In today’s cut-throat marketing world, that just won’t do. I’m waiting for the good folks at Deed Poll to confirm my application for Lion Banjoface.
Once you’ve chosen a new name, you need to make a name for yourself. A great way to do this is publicly proclaim the death of something. TV ads, QR codes and the dotcom are out. Those scalps have already been claimed. Although thankfully only one of them has actually perished. Anyway, in our accelerated world, the sooner you announce the death of something the better. In fact why wait for an innovation or breakthrough to come along before saying it’s dead? Far better to trumpet its demise before it even arrives. Not least because no one can prove you wrong. Word collision is your friend here. Just smash a few buzzwords together to make a new one, like: DisruptiveViralFarming. Have you heard about DisruptiveViralFarming? It’s over. Kaput. Last week’s news. DisruptiveViralFarming is dead!
Finally, laugh in the face of all the evidence that your target market is over 50s. Old people with money to spend are, like, totally boring. Young people are where it’s at. They’re the zeitgeist. But here’s the problem; those pesky kids hate being sold to by traditional advertising methods. This means you’re going to need a new way to reach them. An approach only you can define. And it’s going to involve a live-stream of 3D printed native content story telling. Unless of course that’s what you’re claiming is dead.
Follow these steps to the letter and I almost certainly guarantee success. So if you see me at that awards do you’re going to clean up at, you owe me a drink.